TheAgitator.com
Help Glen Out.
Thursday, December 12th, 2002Glen Whitman wants your suggestions for what to call traveleing groups of various professions, as if they were animals.
Example: You call a group of cattle a “herd,” a group of geese a “gaggle.” So what do you call a group of philosophers? Lawyers? Politicians?
We could take this further. What would you call a group of conservatives? Libertarians? Socialists? Ex-presidents? Former Senate Majority Leaders from Mississippi? Bloggers? Semblers? Bushes? TheAgitator.com frequent commenters? Friends of Bill W.?
The possibilities for quirky/bizarre/unconventioanl humor here are endless. Get your creative juices flowing.
Here are a few off the top of my head, all inspired I’m sure by the post-Christmas-party red wine buzz I’m nursing:
“A collective of socialists.”
“A rash of brothel patrons.”
“A lâche of Frenchmen.” (Look it up.)
“A gaggle of female porn stars.”
“A herd of gossip columnists.”
“A categorizing by species is artificial, and degrading to the uniqueness and authenticity of each individual, and therefore this entire excercise is empty and moot of deconstructionists.”
“A brood of McSweeneys contributors and/or independently-owned coffeshop employees.
“A barefoot nun playing a melted purple trumpet of surrealists.”
Your turn.
I like the “purple melted trumpet” one, i think that was the best
Here’s one: a reminiscence of former Senate Majority Leaders from Mississippi.
How about a steaming pile of lawyers?
I believe the correct term for a group of select US Senators is a klavern.
A fog of bloggers
A group of US Senators with feet in thier mouths would be a “LOTT.”
A group of politically extreme women would be a “COVEN.”
A group of MADD volunteers would obviously be called a “PARTY.”
A “sleaze” of Clintonites.
I like the “steaming pile of lawyers” and I keep picturing a myriad of media feeding on the pile.
How bout
A dunce of reporters
Or a coprophagy of reporters?
I already asked this question about libertarians, back when, and the best answers were a party of libertarians, and a fringe of libertarians.
I am on a roll
A gust of Senators
A bloom (mold) of Attorneys
A waft of libertarians
A sum of accountants
A pool of phelbotomists
A rank of pollsters
A film of paparazzi
I don’t know which groups in particular to assign these to, but…
a flock, a stampede, a posse, a crew, a pack o’, a riot’s worth of, a …
A cache of programmers
A line of telecom professionals (and yes, the “unemployment” prefix is often applicable these days).
A pack of nerds (not to be confused with a pocket protector).
A packet of communications engineers.
A flood of illegal immigrants.
A class of teachers.
A class of Java writers.
A page of webmasters.
A pantheon of theologians.
A roll of fat people … now that’s too close to home, so I’d better stop.
Pardon, but it’s
A dali of surrealists
and
A suckle of porn stars
I might note that a dali of surrealists is the masculine plural, with the female plural being, of course, a dolly.
Here’s some suggestions (already posted at Ted Barlow’s site):
-A coccoon of warbloggers
-A cliche of political journalists
-A corruption of CEOs
-A fatigue of TV commentators
-A disarray of Democrats
-A bongload of marijuana enthusiasts
-A box set of music-store clerks
-A stand of comedians
-A volume of novelists
-A pint of brewers
-A gigabyte of computer nerds
-A Coulter of right wingers
-A lexicon of linguists
-A beat of drummers
-A Lott of idiots
A mob of Anti-Globalizationists
A klan of white supremacists
A nice and orderly group of anarchists
a balloon of blondes (full of air…)
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