Monday Links

Monday, July 2nd, 2012

Greetings. I blog as “Patrick” at Popehat. Unlike my co-blogger Ken, I prefer not to share my real name. Unlike the remainder of Radley’s stellar cast of guest bloggers, I prefer not to mention much about myself. Trust me, you’re not missing much.

I have come to dedicate a portion of this blog, as a final resting place for links that gave their lives that this nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that I should do this.

  • “I’m not brave any more darling. I’m all broken. They’ve broken me.
  • When the President told us, “The private sector is doing fine,” sophistos defended him by pointing out that it is, in contrast to the wretched, awful state of the public sector. Turns out he got that part wrong too.
  • The Eyeballing Game was developed to help woodworkers improve their ability to assess angles. It therefore has no business being such a compelling waste of time.
  • Little Things We Can All Do To Reduce Our Carbon Footprint. This invokes Poe’s Law on many levels.
  • Speaing of Poe’s Law, the reason we don’t have a “fake Rupert Murdoch” twitter feed is that no satirist could beat the genuine article. “Do not forget July Fourth and remember to read the Declaration of Independence aloud. At least once!”
  • What a life … and what an obituary!
  • Scientific survey detects the most hysterical overreaction to Thursday’s health care ruling.
  • “Inside the flat a fruity voice was reading out a list of figures which had something to do with the production of pig-iron. The voice came from an oblong metal plaque like a dulled mirror which formed part of the surface of the right-hand wall. Winston turned a switch and the voice sank somewhat, though the words were still distinguishable. The instrument (the telescreen, it was called) could be dimmed, but there was no way of shutting it off completely.

Up next: puppies!

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31 Responses to “Monday Links”

  1. #1 |  celticdragonchick | 

    Between a murder-for-hire trial and an annual look-alike contest, surely Hemingway, a perfervid admirer of “grace under pressure,” would choose the trial.

    At his most robust, Hemingway exemplified the intrepid defense lawyer:

    He works like hell, and through it…. He has the most profound bravery…. He has had pain[] and the kind of poverty that you don’t believe[;] he has had about eight times the normal allotment of responsibilities. And he has never once compromised. He has never turned off on an easier path than the one he staked himself. It takes courage.

    Dorothy Parker, The Artist’s Reward, THE NEW YORKER, Nov. 30, 1929, at 28-30 (describing Hemingway). Perhaps a lawyer who evokes Hemingway can resist relaxing frolic in favor of solemn duty.

    Or, at least, “Isn’t it pretty to think so?”

    Best of luck to counsel in next year’s contest. The motion (Doc. 127) is DENIED.


    Now that was funny.

    Extra cool historical note:

    As World War II ended in Europe, Hemingway personally liberated the bar as the Nazis were retreating. It was expected that General Leclerc, in command of the Allied troops, would be first on the scene, marching up the Avenue de la Grande Armée with a full panoply of tanks, artillery, flags, and bands. But well before Leclerc could get there, a jeep came careening up the avenue, zipped under the Arc de Triomphe, down the Champs-Élysées, and across the Place de la Concorde, then skidded to a stop in the Place Vendôme at the entrance of the Ritz. Hemingway was in command of that jeep. Ostensibly a war correspondent, but with a gun slung in the crook of his arm, he had taken charge of the motley group in the vehicle, most of them stragglers who had become separated from their units. Hemingway called them his “Irregulars.”

  2. #2 |  Aresen | 

    Only a fiend who wanted me to waste the rest of my life would have posted a link to the eyeballing game. (Score: 6.34 in 219 seconds)

  3. #3 |  Boyd Durkin | 

    Patrick Gaspard’s tweet reminded me of when I was 13 and caught a line drive to end a post-season baseball game. I said “Eat shit, asshole!”, but the most important part, and this is key, is that I was 13. Plus, let’s not forget that the ruling stated “It’s a tax! And all taxes are awesome!” which is exactly what Obamacare supporters said it wasn’t (a tax).

    As a guy who has pics of Mises and Popper on his wall, I’m pretty sure I know what we’re going to be saying about quality health care and the national expense of Obamacare in 10 years. Others disagree. Place your bets.

  4. #4 |  texx | 

    I did not think I was still gullible, but the “baby credits” and old-pet euthanization got me.

  5. #5 |  Bronwyn | 

    7.67 in 107 s

    Dangerous link. I’m going to have to improve my score. This will take time….

  6. #6 |  Dave Krueger | 


    The cop who can’t be fired from his $60,000 job despite beating suspects, carrying drugs in patrol car and being jailed three times

  7. #7 |  C. S. P. Schofield | 

    Something to do to reduce your carbon footprint;

    Ruthlessly beat anybody who uses the term “Carbon Footprint” in your presence until they learn to shut their pie-holes.

    Useless, parasitic, self-satisfied, elitist twits.

  8. #8 |  Endless Mike | 

    It’s sad that it took even a fairly careful examination of the GreenTremayne page didn’t really convince me that it was a gag; I have heard virtually every one of these “solutions” (with the exception of early pet euthanization) sincerely espoused by true believers in the past.

    I had to go to the products page and see that the carbon credits were “backordered” and that they were actually selling a satirical novel about the green movement. Kind of a clever way to promote a book…

  9. #9 |  Brandon | 

    Dammit! The Baby Credits are on backorder! Now how do I get my daily dose of sanctimony?

  10. #10 |  Brandon | 

    Boy, that Convergence test on the Woodgears site really makes you respect the guys who had to aim the Death Star. Must’ve been tough.

  11. #11 |  Ted S. | 

    5.88 in 109 seconds

  12. #12 |  Patrick from Popehat | 

    The easiest giveway, Endless Mike, is the coupon good for a discounted “blunt force euthanasia” at “EuthanEazy” (not valid for primates!) elsewhere on the site.

  13. #13 |  Brandon | 

    4.44 in 113.59 seconds. I’m almost an entire standard deviation above the mean!

  14. #14 |  Leon Wolfeson | 

    @3 – Because the cost-savings won’t be allowed to be realized, sure. The Republicans are already lining up to condemn them.

    @7 – Yup, for the crime of disagreeing with you. You’d make a FINE cop (see the other thread ^^)

  15. #15 |  Bronwyn | 

    I’ve got it down to 4.86 in 130 s. Gotta keep working at it!

  16. #16 |  Danny | 

    I don’t think that link on the public sector jobs bears out your interpretation.

  17. #17 |  Endless Mike | 

    @Patrick – Yep, I also could have noted your reference to Poe’s law in the same freaking post. I missed “EuthanEazy”, that is wonderful, as is the Miss America photo for Daphne Tremayne.

  18. #18 |  Roho | 

    I stopped caring about my carbon footprint after finding out that I should’ve just crawled in a hole and died when I was a kid.

    (For the curious not wanting to play a crappy and noisy flash ‘game’, the largest single factor in whether one should crawl in a hole and die seems to be salary)

  19. #19 |  Carl "Bear" Bussjaeger | 

    RE: Carbon Footprints-

    Heh, Who knew Ferguson, Manson, et al wee really just green?

  20. #20 |  Helmut O' Hooligan | 

    LOL loved the melodramatic graphic that said “6-28-12: The day freedom died”. Silly conservative, where have you been? If you think this corporatist compromise of a law is the worst blow to freedom ever then you haven’t been paying attention. Shit, healthcare stocks went up when the law was passed, so you’d think Republicans would be happy. The inconveniences of this law will trickle down to the people, as always. This motherfucker needs to read the Agitator if he wants to see how freedom is being undermined every day.

    Welcome Patrick!

  21. #21 |  rmv | 

    “Up next: puppies!”

    Anyone else worried?

  22. #22 |  Robert | 


    It’s not so much as this specific law, but rather that SCOTUS pretty much said congress can do whatever the fuck it wants, and make you do whatever it wants, as long as they attach it to the tax code.

  23. #23 |  Jeff | 

    John Dingell, meet Poe’s Law.

  24. #24 |  RWP | 

    2.70 @ 146s

  25. #25 |  Onlooker | 

    That spoof about reducing carbon footprint is funny and scary, at the same time. Too close to the truth in this world, I fear.

  26. #26 |  Juice | 

    On the “make a right angle” one I got it dead on the line, but my line wasn’t as long as the other line, so it gave me an error of 4.5. I call bullshit.

  27. #27 |  Stormy Dragon | 

    First try was 4.91 in 83.9 s

  28. #28 |  World’s Strangest | R.I.P., Count de Badass | 

    […] -via The Agitator | Photo: Daily […]

  29. #29 |  Other Sean | 

    10.59 in 102.38

    It’s constitutional, bitches!

  30. #30 |  Dan Danknick | 

    At my downtown company, an in-building parking pass is up for grabs every Friday based on a trivia exam. The winner from last week must devise a new contest for the next week, and though I’m partial to a mix of mythology, anatomy and etymology – and absolutely nothing you would ever f-ing learn while watching TV – I will use the Eyeballing Game this week.

    Because, it is a great equalizer. And it kicks ass.

  31. #31 |  Rick H. | 

    3.33 in 340 seconds, because I’m too careful.