Gwinnett County’s Greatest Hits

Friday, January 27th, 2012

You may remember Gwinnett County, Georgia from such hits as “Where Did the Coke Go?,”  “Smothered, Covered, and Tasered,”   “The I Accidentally Entered the Wrong House and Killed a Dalmatian Blues”  “Disabled Guy and a SWAT Team,”  “No-Knock, Wrong Wouse,”  and the follow-up just a few months later, “Sorry We Pointed Our Guns at Your Baby (We Got the Wrong House Again.)”

Now, Sheriff Butch Conway has entered the world of web video, teaming up with a Bail Bonds outfit to bring you a video roundup of Northeast Metro Atlanta’s biggest dirtbags*, complete with a bitchin’ guitar soundtrack and bad-ass crime reenactments. Enjoy!

(*Note: All suspects are presumed innocent until proven guilty. You pussy.)


Digg it |  reddit | |  Fark

17 Responses to “Gwinnett County’s Greatest Hits”

  1. #1 |  Gus S. Calabrese | 

    A martian looking at the video would conclude that the police were more violent and dangerous than any criminals they were pursuing. An armed individual can shoot at ( and defend themselves ) a private-enterprise criminal but not at a public servant being violent. Very scary….. 99guspuppet

  2. #2 |  CSD | 

    When talking about Gwinnett County, Georgia and historical justice one can’t forget an all time classic, this obscenity trial.

  3. #3 |  matt | 

    Gah. I work there now (Gwinnett). I would think (neighboring) Cobb is probably worse, though.

  4. #4 |  MattJ | 

    I’ve lived in DeKalb, Fulton, and Cobb, and I would take Gwinnett over any of them.

    I moved cross-country to DeKalb Co. just months after their Sheriff Elect Derwin Brown was assassinated on the orders of the incumbent he had just been elected to replace, Sheriff Dorsey.

    And Nothing Else Happened.

  5. #5 |  PogueMahone | 

    I move for a change of venue, Your Honor.

  6. #6 |  Matt I. | 

    As an unfortunate resident of Gwinnett County, I’d have to say that we have the worst possible combination of anti-liberty constituents: Right wing, suburban soccer mom Baptists, surrounded by mostly Black & Hispanic neighbors…such a great place to be a libertarian!

    There’s no such thing as too much police to these people.

  7. #7 |  Todd M. | 

    Got to love the attention to detail in this video. While “gwinnett county sheriff’s depratment” is a forgivable typo, I find it curious they didn’t specifically mention suspect Munguia’s shape-shifting abilities. (Conway states the suspect is 5’6″, 160# while his profile claims 5’2″, 200#.)

  8. #8 |  CyniCAl | 


  9. #9 |  Pi Guy | 

    This just blurs to smear the lines between politics, law enforcement, and entertainment. Whoever catches the most suspects (they save the really rough stuff for when you’re actually found guilty, I’ll bet) gets the highest ratings, ie: most votes.

    Digging far too deeply in this direction, it occurs to me that this might be an effective way to keep career politicians out of office. Sorta like Survivor-meets-Cops-meets-GOP Prez Debates. I mean, we’re like half way there already.

  10. #10 |  Helmut O' Hooligan | 

    Ok CyniCAL, you’re right. Everyone is crazy except for you. And I’m a retard.

    Look man, I will never claim that that was my best moment on this blog. I was angry. Like most situations, going in angry seldom makes things better. But you have said some fairly outlandish and insensitive things on this blog too. We all vent.

    I know where you are coming from ideologically, but I just thought that this was one case where maybe you needed to focus more on the fact that a true victim escaped with her life rather than your abject hatred of anyone who wears a badge. Again, the true aggressor here was the man who took an eleven year old girl against her will.

    Step outside your strident committment to your ideology for a moment. Is it really so wrong that Radley suggested that their might be a few legitimate reasons to have a SWAT team? At this time, I would tend to agree with his assessment. In your ideal society, private protection agencies may have “extraction teams” on hand for such matters. You are entitled to your view of what a future society society may bring. I am entitled to live in the now. But, as Alan Watts (philosopher and interpreter of eastern philosphy-religions) said, “the future is a hoax.” That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try to prepare for a better, more peaceful future. It just means that it hasn’t happened yet, so we can’t obsess over it. If we do this–and we all do it–then we will exhaust ourselves and burn ourselves out before we reach that future.

    What I just stated is one of the primary points of zen. Slow down, live in the moment. Appreciate the connectedness of all things. I am trying to do this now in my own life. I am trying not to respond with knee-jerk anger, though I failed in that thread (and so did you). And I am trying to move away from the dualism inherent in these politic arguments that we have here. As the old Taoist masters would suggest, we only know good because bad naturally exists. We only know up because down exists, etc.

    Keeping this in mind, the mission of the police (or whatever actors may come to replace them in the future) should be to help society to manage conflicts that will inevitably occur. As a former cop and current Buddhist monk suggested in a recent interview, police must be at peace with themselves first or they will not be able to be peace keepers. Those of us who read The Agitator know that too many of today’s police are not at peace with themselves. Even worse, they see little connection between themselves and the people they interact with. One doesn’t have to buy into Zen or Taoism to see that this is a disaster in the making.

    Anyway, sorry for the long-winded post, CyniCAL. I’m not trying to preach, just share ideas. I apologize for escalating this situation. And I would appreciate it if you would refrain from suggesting that my posts are “retarded.” Being angry is natural and does not suggest that the angry person has a mental disability. You are not my enemy. You and I are more alike–whether we are referring to ideology, basic needs or DNA profile–than we are different. It then follows that you and the police officers you rail against are also, on the whole, more alike than you may suspect. Right now, police agencies exist and, in my opinion, will have to exist for the foreseeable future. Isn’t it better then to try to improve these existing structures, to minimize the damage they may do and to hold them to what their stated mission–serve and protect–is supposed to be?

  11. #11 |  Helmut O' Hooligan | 

    *Note: All suspects are presumed innocent until proven guilty. You pussy.)

    Ha! Man, Butch Conway is trying to steal John Walsh’s gig. Too bad he doesn’t have the TV charisma. And “brought to you by AA Professional Bail Bonding.” Huh, another example of the tight relationship between government law enforcement and for-profit entities seeking to make more money off of our growing police state (like private prisons, as was discussed here the other day). Charming!

  12. #12 |  Fatwa Arbuckle | 

    Nice to see that my local sheriff is expanding his media-whoredom.

    Another one of his little misadventures occurred when one of Butch’s deputies falsely arrested a county commissioner (who was no prize himself) for DUI when his BAC was actually a big, fat zero:

    After staking out the restaurant, a deputy watched Bannister get into his car and — according to the arrest report — watched him weave from side to side and cut off another vehicle, nearly causing an accident.

    The deputy reported smelling a strong odor of alcohol on Bannister’s breath and said the chairman failed three field sobriety tests.

    But Bannister insisted he had only two beers over two hours and was sober. And a breath test administered at the jail showed his blood alcohol content to be .000.

    At the news conference, Conway said he does not think his deputy lied.

    The deputy who made the false arrest had a history of similar “problems”:

    A review of Deputy Michael G. Cummings’ personnel file showed that he was disciplined for twice determining an impaired person to be sober while he worked for the Gwinnett County Police Department. Cummings resigned from the police department in 2006 to take a job at the Sheriff’s Department.

    In 2004, Cummings received verbal counseling for failing to detect that a driver who caused a minor accident was impaired. A year later, he was suspended for three days after testifying that a friend arrested for drunken driving was not intoxicated even though the friend tested at more than twice the legal limit for alcohol intoxication.

  13. #13 |  CyniCAl | 

    Well put, Helmut. I regret making it personal. Anger is not a good emotion. You took me a bit by surprise, I just want you to know that we all have those moments once in a while and I would never permanently judge you by one thing you wrote. I think we agree reciprocally on that. My comment applied to your comment, not to you, I should have been clearer.

    We agree often enough that we can agree to disagree on this one. There were no SWAT teams for much of human existence … heck, there were no professional police forces for much of human existence, so I see no prima facie justification for the existence of SWAT teams. SWAT teams, like pro police forces, are institutions now, serving their own interests above all else and at a tremendous cost to liberty. I fail to see how falsely attributing success to one miraculous instance of SWAT behavior advances the cause of liberty.

    In fact, not to beat a dead horse, but is just those rare spectacular “successes” that give people, “civilian” and state agent alike, the idea that things like SWAT teams are a good idea. Next thing you know, you have podunk town police forces in South Carolina with armored personnel carriers and million-dollar federal grants for high-powered weaponry. I know slippery-slope arguments are frowned upon, but this is the status quo, where just 50 years ago SWAT didn’t even exist.

    Not that the establishment would bother, but wouldn’t it be just too ironic to bear if Radley’s defense of “appropriate use of SWAT” were quoted to justify SWAT expenditures?

    Of course, I am happy for the young hostage and her family that she is safe and sound. The kidnapper is the bad guy and he won’t be hurting anyone else ever again. Miracles do happen. And future policy will be founded on said miracle. May no one any of us care for find themselves in the crossfire.

    Peace out, Helmut.

  14. #14 |  derfel cadarn | 

    I assume that Peter Pan,Tinkerbell and the Tooth fairy wafted in on a moonbeam and absconded with the narcotics. There seems to be no possibility that LEOs might have been involved, seeing as it was someones jobs to secure all evidence and that security has not occurred it would appear that someone is criminally remiss. This is a story of staggering corruption and criminal incompetence,either way heads should roll.

  15. #15 |  Helmut O' Hooligan | 


    Thanks for responding. I’m glad you did. Hopefully I can avoid reacting like that in the future, since I am trying to look at things from a newer–and I think more productive–perspective these days.

    And I definitely share your concerns about the proliferation of SWAT. After the Columbine incident, more forward thinking police agencies began to realize that over-reliance on SWAT can cost people their lives. In the area I live in, training began which taught first responding patrol officers to go in immediately–no waiting for SWAT–in order to neutralize the threat. For active shooter situations, this should be recommended protocol. Don’t wait while people die.

    It occurs to me that relying too much on SWAT–or other specialists–is like relying too much on government. It makes you forget how to take care of the basics. It can even infantalize people. Any patrol officer worth his or her salt should be prepared to end an assault alone if necessary, not wait for SWAT. If SWAT teams are to exist, I envision them as regional entities that are called if first responders have not been able to resolve a situation or in a major incident. Small towns in South Carolina should NEVER have SWAT teams and, in a freer society, would be roundly lampooned and criticized for even suggesting the possibility.

    Take care.

  16. #16 |  Targeted Individual | 

    Ahh…Gwinnett’s “finest.”

    As an outspoken Libertarian and a Gwinnett County resident since 1990, I can assure you our police are heavily involved in illegal activities, including breaking and entering, illegal searches, planting evidence, and Organized Stalking. Many times, the fire personnel and medics get involved, too.

    They recently framed me for two serious felonies. I’ve never committed a felony in my life, but now I’m looking at serious prison time, at the age of 35. Georgia totally sucks. There is a reason the term ‘Dirty South’ exists. Our local governments and forces are totally corrupt, self-righteous dirtbags who fancy themselves ‘Christians.’ They are the most un-christian people I’ve ever known.

    Don’t believe me? Google Organized Stalking and Gwinnett County Police. You’ll find plenty of stories about the human rights abuses committed here on a daily basis. There are some good videos on YouTube, as well.

    As Matt I. stated, this is as bad a place for Libertarians as they come! I honestly believe most of my neighbors would elect Heinrich Himmler if they could.

    After they arrested me on false charges, the local yokels even told me to stop reading Radley’s website. Wonder how they knew what websites I visit? Illegal surveillance? You’d better believe it!

    They were convinced I dislike the police, so I suspect that’s what started my Organized Stalking. You’d better believe after experiencing first-hand that our local police are worse than ANY criminal, I very much dislike them…

  17. #17 |  Curt | 

    Hey Radley… it seems like there’s a bunch of us down here in Metro ATL (apparently all named Matt, excluding me). Not too far from Nashville. You should find an excuse to come down and give a talk at one of the colleges. I’d gladly buy you a few beers.