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Someday people will get it that it’s the meaning implied by the speaker and not the word that hurts. Moron, imbecile, cretin, and idiot were once scientific classifications of intelligence levels. Any word chosen to describe that which people hate will eventually become tools of their hatred.
I love the onion. It is getting harder and harder to tell the supposedly real stuff from what the onion puts out.
Off topic alert.
Washington State lawmaker wants government to start calling “at-risk” kids “at hope” kids. Because it’s the label that’s the problem.
Nothing odd about that. Isn’t that essentially the same reason “affirmative action” is now called “diversity”?
NPR is covering the topic of diversity all week. Basically, it consists of interviews with a bunch of experts all of whom extol the benefits of diversity that most employers are apparently ignorant of. I’m not opposed to diversity, but I’m always suspicious when a news organization pushes only one side of an argument. There is no doubt that a lot of discrimination is simply due to the inertia of past attitudes, but I believe a lot of employment discrimination is based on opinions people still fervently adhere to, but will not discuss because even discussing those opinions is deemed to be too insensitive or antagonistic.
I find it particularly depressing that the idea that the owners of a company should be able to make their hiring own hiring decisions based on any criteria they want is no longer even worthy of mention and is largely considered backwards and racist. The concept that private property (especially as applied to business) has been almost entirely wiped out of existence. We’ve passed from feudal society where the aristocracy owned everything through a brief flirtation where ordinary citizens owned property and are now in the phase where government owns everything, letting people claim title in name only.
Sometimes I think we’re so stupid we deserve all the oppression we get.
I love the Onion, but sometimes their older articles make me laugh not because they’re particularly funny now, but because the subject matter has become a common occurrence rather than a completely absurd exaggeration. It seems to me that you could use current Onion articles to predict the state of our society in a few years.
Re: the Portland story.
“To a large extent, plaintiff’s attorney has created this situation,” Rice wrote.
No, I’d say the cops beating the crap out of someone created this situation.
Uh….If “at risk” is damaging becuase of what it implies, aren’t people smart enought to figure out that “at hope” = “at risk”?
There will never again be a professional football team that has an undefeated season. Shula and the Dolphins will be able to drink champagne from now on.
Re: Portland Item:
What they’re thinking: “Shit, it’s not like we went out of our way to kill the guy. He just died from the same treatment we give all ordinary citizens who irritate us. The real problem here is all the bad press. I thought those assholes in the media were on our side. They’re supposed to be our friends, especially in light of all the inside info we feed them on what really happened when one of our guys is falsely accused of something by some confused civilian. Holy crap, what if someone gets on the jury that we beat the shit out of in the past. I know the chances are probably (well, maybe) less than 50-50, but we have to protect against that. We should get the case moved out of state. In fact, the more obstacles we can throw in front of them, the better. Has someone contacted the judge to remind him he has a wife and family to think about when he decides the issue of venue? Anyway, let’s call a meeting to discuss how to deal with these assholes who question our behavior. We don’t want this becoming a habit.”
“At hope” doesn’t make sense grammatically. And it’s sounds fucking stupid.
Hey, your gonna need Manning well rested if you want a shot at the Chargers.
Re: the Portland story, its telling that the cops still beat the crap out of people even in a white, liberal, progressive city like Portland Oregon. Telling, because it shows that cops exist in their own social and legal universe completely uncoupled from the broader society. If they keep blocking civilian review and other forms of accountability, the only chance that the population gets to call them to account is in court. F…em.
Even in conservative, law and order Pheonix you are seeing opposition to the brutality of Sheriff Joe. I sense the winds shifting…
Man, I was disappointed the Patriots lost in the first round. Not because I thought the Patriots had any real shot of going anywhere in the playoffs, but because I wanted the first Playoff game for the Colts to be vs the Jets. It would have been fantastic if the Colts choked and lost the game to the very team they let into the playoffs by intentionally blowing their perfect season. It was still a pretty close game at the half when Manning was pulled so I think the Jets would have had a shot of pulling it off too.
I’m not an Indy fan, but I think if Peyton had gotten hurt in the 4th quarter of a meaningless game, there would be a lot of screaming from the same people taking the opposite side of the argument.
The super bowl is the only thing that matters.
Hahahaha! More of that, you know, “new professionalism”.
This may turn out to be one of those internal case studies to find out what went wrong (not in terms of his committing robberies, of course, but to find out how the bozo managed to get charged with an actual crime).
Off topic:
Shouldn’t this be some sort of badge of honor?
http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/local/os-apology-sign-officer-20100112,0,3417194.story
She battered a cop and gets to brag about it. :)
re Dave Krueger’s story regarding Minnessota cop who was late to work coz he was robbing a store.
Dave: there is still lots of “new professionalism” in the story.
–The armed robber was originally questioned before he committed the robbery: he told them he was a cop and so they left him alone
– After being fingered for the crime, he isn’t in jail. “Carson is now on administrative leave.” No mention of whether it is paid, but when do you hear about UNPAID admin leave for a cop.
I’m in agreement with flukebucket and arglebargle. The NFL is not an environment that encourages and undefeated regular season. Strategically, it doesn’t make sense to risk your capital assets once you have secured the best spot in the playoffs. You win the war by winning the Super Bowl, not by winning every battle. People need to realize that their hopes for undefeated seasons in the NFL isn’t practical and never will be.
But hey, if you want to watch your favorite team strive for an undefeated season, there is always college football, where you have to win every game and get “style points” to get a shot at the national title. That’s why everyone loves the BCS and thinks it’s the greatest thing on Earth and no one would ever dream of having a playoff system in college football.
You just gotta keep things in perspective.
@ #15
Stephen, that is awesome. It would be even better if the cops inside got to watch people walking by and high-fiving her all day long!
This may be an unpopular view, but the City of Portland is as entitled to a fair trial as an defendant in a civil trial. It’s quite possible that they can’t get a jury in Oregon that hasn’t already formed a belief that it is liable. If so, and if it can be done without unfairly disadvantaging the plaintiff, the judge can and should move the trial. Lynch mobs are never just, no matter how tempting they might be.
Joe Rollino was amazing! The story leaves me wanting, though. It has me wondering why a person driving a vehicle does not see a guy 40? feet out in the street!? Not speed or alcohol? What abut talking on the cell phone or some other cause for inattention.
2)At hope? These kids have no hope. They are only kids! They have very little they can, actually, do about changing their situations!! “At hope”! LOL!!
3)I would love to help in Haiti. But.. my talents go unused.
I would like to see a cop sentenced to wearing a sign like that for battering an innocent civilian (…or killing one in a drug raid …or injuring one during a high speed chase …or tasing one for having a seizure …or…)
I think you can make a case that the trial should be kept in Portland because it’s the citizens of Portland who will have to live with the results of their verdict.
Excellent point!
@qwints
Governments never seem to worry about media tainting the jury pool when they’re the ones prosecuting instead of defending.
Since journalists always use that magic word “allegedly” in front of every unfounded accusation they print or televise about the criminal de jour, we can be sure that these people are receiving fair trials in front of by unbiased juries.
I agree that defendants, no matter who they are, should have access to impartial juries. I just wish prosecutors and law enforcement would show as much concern for impartiality for the accused as they do when their own necks are on the line.
It hardly seemed possible, but things are getting ever weirder in the case of Dymond Milburn, the 12-year-old African-American girl whose mother claims in court that several Galveston cops jumped out of an unmarked van, tried to kidnap Dymond and then beat her up in her front yard for no real reason at all.
[...]
The Case Of That 12-Year-Old Girl Beat up By Galveston Cops Drags On
My favorite part of the Onions’ Wes Welker article;
Although the wideout’s attitude has been celebrated by sportswriters and fans alike as scrappy and overachieving, hospital personnel have described him as “exhausting,” “intolerable,” and “the most infuriating little cocksucker ever to walk God’s green earth.”
The Onion rarely misses.
I like the fact that after the girl ‘pushed him in the face and knocked his glasses off’, Officer Brennan then ‘forced her to the ground and cuffed her.’ Yet who is on the street with an embarrassing sign, has to do 50 hours of community service, and a year of probation?
Maybe if she likes to push people, she should just become a cop.
I’m surprised nobody has posted about California taking steps to legalize marijuana and treat it like it does alcohol:
http://www.nytimes.com/aponline/2010/01/12/us/AP-US-Marijuana-Legalization.html
It might be a largely symbolic vote, tho, as it’s not expected to be considered before Friday.
Am I the only commenter on this thread who absolutely detests the Superbowl and the hype that surrounds it? (With plenty of detestation left over for the NFL in general.)
May somebody slip LSD into their Gatorade on game day.
@#6 “at hope” = “at risk” is the same as South Los Angeles” translates to “South Central” in the mind’s ear of any Angelino. The name change by the city fathers was done to rid a dangerous, violent neighborhood of the stigma of bring a violent, dangerous neighborhood.
It remains, almost a decade later, a violent, dangerous neighborhood.
Edited it to PC-speech.
I actually live in Portland and while I used to defend our police force in some cases it’s just become embarrassing. One of the officers responsible for the Chasse murder actually shot a 12 year old girl with a beanbag gun a month or two ago and when the city council stepped in to suspend him, the police union pitched an absolute fit and the decision was reversed.
There is a lot of shit on this site that depresses me, but reading that someone like Joe Rollino, at 104, got killed by a fucking minivan just about takes the cake. Jesus Christ.
#5, they didn’t beat the crap out of Chasse, they KILLED him. And then lied about it. Proven on video tape at the police station. And continued to lie about it. And then Humphreys goes on to shoot others.
Of course all of the cops want a change of venue. Can’t have The State’s murderers lose a case! Potter used to be Portland Chief of Police, so he has their back much in the same way that Sotomayor will have the back of the Blue Family.
#32, that was Humphreys that shot the 12 year old girl. He is the same person that tackled Chasse, lied about it, and was caught on the police station’s cameras laughing it up about it to one of his co-workers. I don’t know if that video has gone down the memory hole, but I watched it and was disgusted.
“I’m not an Indy fan, but I think if Peyton had gotten hurt in the 4th quarter of a meaningless game, there would be a lot of screaming from the same people taking the opposite side of the argument.
The super bowl is the only thing that matters.”
Of course if the Colts lose to the Ravens this weekend then you’ll have an even bigger negative reaction with the whole “Players were no longer in game condition after too long of a break” argument.
I have to wonder if the Portland PD (and/or POA) fed the press as a ploy to make it a high-profile trial, a gambit for change of venue. After all, “jury of your peers” is an outdated concept and if you’re caught red-handed breaking the law then it behooves you to poison the pool.