Mumble Has Two Dads

Saturday, December 20th, 2008

Eat it, Santorum:

A pair of gay penguins thrown out of their zoo colony for repeatedly stealing eggs have been given some of their own to look after following a protest by animal rights groups.

Last month the birds were segregated after they were caught  placing stones at the feet of parents before waddling away with their eggs.

But angry visitors to Polar Land in Harbin, northern China, complained it wasn’t fair to stop the couple from becoming surrogate fathers and urged zoo bosses to give them a chance.

In response, zookeepers gave the pair two eggs laid by an inexperienced first-time mother.

‘We decided to give them two eggs from another couple whose hatching ability had been poor and they’ve turned out to be the best parents in the whole zoo,’ said one of the keepers.

‘It’s very encouraging and if this works out well we will try to arrange for them to become real parents themselves with artificial insemination.’

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25 Responses to “Mumble Has Two Dads”

  1. #1 |  Helmut O' Hooligan | 

    Radley,
    Please forward this story to Rick Warren before he gives the invocation at the innaugral. It could be food for thought. Nah, probably not. He’s already invested to much time and energy in bashing gays, so its unlikely a little thing like BIOLOGY will change his mind.

  2. #2 |  PersonFromPorlock | 

    So, do the chicks end up GLBT?

  3. #3 |  marta rose | 

    you crack me up, radley! this made my day. thanks!

  4. #4 |  Billy Beck | 

    “A pair of gay penguins…”

    What stupid bullshit. Penguins are actually quite morose.

    I want that word back. No peace until the that theft is redeemed.

    That is all.

  5. #5 |  Stephen | 

    Animals rights groups in CHINA? What the hell is going on here?

    Anybody remember Tiananmen Square? I guess they care more about gay penguins than people.

  6. #6 |  John Jenkins | 

    I love the fact that someone was protesting for the rights of penguins in China. Not the rights of humans in China (are homosexuals in China treated the same way as they were in the old U.S.S.R., by imprisonment, or worse?), but the rights of Penguins to have eggs (other penguins’ eggs, mind you, so I suppose that works out all right from the communist perspective).

  7. #7 |  Gonzo | 

    Gay or straight, penguins are far too smug. Time to take them down a peg, is what I say.

  8. #8 |  Mike | 

    Wouldn’t that be more correct as “Mumbo has two Mommies”? Either that or that artificial insemination plan they are proposing might run into some difficulties

  9. #9 |  Cynical In CA | 

    Fuck you, penguin!

  10. #10 |  tim | 

    @hooligan

    “to much time and energy in bashing gays,”

    Unlike many other evangelical leaders Rick Warren does not spend a lot of time obsessing about gay sex or “bashing gays” as you put it. My primary fault with Warren (outside of being an evangelical) is that he hasn’t given the subject that much thought (this is obvious by his public comments). I think its unfair to group him with the Dobsons of the world (who intentionally do real and last harm) and the left would be better served if they didn’t completely overreact to him being part of the inaugural … oh wait – i’m a little late on that aren’t I?

  11. #11 |  Z | 

    I never understood the whole anti-gay marriage movement: the rap on gays is that they are a bunch of promiscuous anarchist leeches who want to get on welfare, destroy the West and get to your boy scouts. Therefore the idea that gays want to be boring, middle class average Joes and Janes with jobs, commitment and station wagons should be welcome news. Besides the divorce rate is already 70% so why pretend that marriage is sacred?

  12. #12 |  Helmut O' Hooligan | 

    #10 Tim:
    Recently I saw an interview with Warren in which he conflated homosexuality with incest, polygamy and pedophilia. One does not have to be a human sexuality scholar to see that these are poor comparisons. I think you are correct that Warren is not as aggressive or hostile as Dobson, Robertson, the late Rev. Falwell and other arch-theocrats. But, I don’t feel compelled to retract by “bashing” comment, because I believe his ignorance is willful.

    As for the Left overreacting to Warren, to the extent that I am still a member of the Left (my libertarian leanings may disqualify me in the eyes of some Progressives), I am not losing any sleep over the whole invocation thing. If I were president-elect, I wouldn’t have a religous invocation because I am a militant agnostic. I guess that’s just one more reason I’ll never be president of the United States.

  13. #13 |  cuernimus | 

    What about the poor inexperienced mother having her eggs stolen from her? How can she expect to become an experienced mother when her eggs are continually hijacked by BigHomosexualPenguin?

    @John Jenkins
    IIRC, homosexuality is illegal in China, but is mostly tolerated nowadays because they believe it is only a phase young men go through. So it’s possible to be gay, as long as he plans on eventually settling down and starting a family and to continue the family name.

  14. #14 |  Cynical In CA | 

    OK, for the not so swift, or the short of memory, let’s try this again.

    From the Agitator’s morning links from Wed. Dec. 17th:

    http://fuckyoupenguin.blogspot.com/

    Fuck you, penguin!

    Jesus, you negative karma freaks, get a fucking grip.

  15. #15 |  max | 

    Finnally, government intervention into private matters Balko can support. Why stop with penguins though, why not take children away from young humans (teenagers for example) and give them to homosexual human couples, solve 2 of societies “problems” with one act.

  16. #16 |  Frank N | 

    Peguins are the beotch’s of the monkey butler world.

  17. #17 |  PolyTick | 

    I blame gay marriage.

  18. #18 |  Stephen | 

    “Besides the divorce rate is already 70% so why pretend that marriage is sacred?”

    This is basically my attitude now after being divorced. Marriage has already been destroyed by no-fault divorce. Why all the ruckus now?

    I think that govt should get out of the marriage business altogether.

    Treat everyone as individuals at the federal level at least. No difference between married or not.

  19. #19 |  Boyd Durkin | 

    Very nice to see animal rights groups active in China. One indication that things have come a long way.

    I’m not one of those we-can-only-do-one-thing-at-a-time-and-that-has-to-be-human-rights guy. Humans cannot grow in just one area.

  20. #20 |  VikingMoose | 

    cool, Radley!

    oh, hey, Mr. Beck! it’s been a year since that epic thread. how’s things? best to you

    max: huh???? that’s quite the stretch, there, my man.

  21. #21 |  Billy Beck | 

    “how’s things?”

    Fucking rotten.

    “best to you”

    I appreciate that, but I think I have other plans for the next four years, at least.

  22. #22 |  parse | 

    Billy Beck, I understand you might be a strong supporter of property rights, but I’m not sure words can be stolen.

  23. #23 |  Former Army | 

    I can’t read the word santorum without thinking of the definition some of Dan Savage’s readers created for it.

  24. #24 |  Lucy | 

    Don’t tell the right wingers, this will only confirm their suspicions that gay people want to steal straight people’s children. Clearly these are evil, evil penguins. Godless, child-stealing penguins.

  25. #25 |  Spleen | 

    If I were president-elect, I wouldn’t have a religous invocation because I am a militant agnostic.

    So you’re aggressively unsure if there’s a god?

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