TheAgitator.com
Dating 2.0
Thursday, August 14th, 2008Hey dillweed, when you agreed to be my Facebook friend after our date, did it not occur to you that I’d see your “In a Relationship” relationship status? Is Facebook really that difficult to master?
I’m filing this in the “Alcohol” category, because you must’ve been drunk.
–Mary Q. Contrarian
Maybe after one date he thought he was in a relationship with you?
That’s exactly why, in the profile, the menu of selections under “Relationship” should include, It depends on who’s asking.
On the other hand, in the world of today, the idea that one is only permitted one relationship at a time is no longer a certainty.
Don’t be such a prude. :p
My strategy is just to leave it blank.
That way, you can’t be pressured into saying that you’re “into a relationship” too early into the relationship or that you’re still single too late into the relationship.
Maybe he’s Mormon? Muslim?
Another reason not to use Facebook! Sweet.
Hey, maybe his pseudonym is single?
Or, maybe he WAS in a relationship and never changed his status?
There are plenty of possibilities. Why don’t you just ask him why his status is such instead of jumping to conclusions?
It’s less a commentary on whether he has a girlfriend. It’s really more the lack of mastery of Facebook that bugged me.
So facebook mastery is a requirement for prospective dates now?
I can see it now “May I please see your latest STD report, proof of income, FaceBook and MySpace certifications, and typing speed tests please?”
(I keep a facebook profile to prevent others from creating one for me without my knowledge but beyond my phone number and e-mail address – all fields are blank. Not that I can’t “master” facebook – its because I don’t trust it.)
Awesome! I’m going to set up a Facebook and just put stupid stuff in it to weed you out.
If this is a problem, then all the other stuff… like which shelf I put my plates on… or my habitual misuse of the ellipsis will set you off 10 times a day.
Tim: So cacebook mastery is a requirement for prospective dates now?
Yes. For better or worse, for people who use it–and other social networking tools–it is a part of the dating process. Bad etiquette on the ‘book is like having bad phone manners.
I am so happy I am married these days. As technologically savvy as I am, I’m afraid I would never pass muster. My life in the meat world requires me to put true concerns over updating my profile on FB or MS. This is not to say I think it is trivial that others find these things important, it’s just how unimportant they are to me. And again how happy I am happy to be out of the mating game if it means this sort of commitment. As I recall, I wasn’t too great at it before all the social networking sites became hip. I’d probably be singing the praises of internet pr0n right about now if giving prompt updates to them were a requirement . . .
Oh, yes, this is SUCH a legitimate gripe. Because we all know that females NEVER put out false information in this department.
“Because we all know that females NEVER put out”
You’re dating the wrong girls, Dave.
It’s less a commentary on whether he has a girlfriend. It’s really more the lack of mastery of Facebook that bugged me.
Maybe he changed it after your date? Not because he thought he was in a relationship with you, but because he wanted to prevent one with you?
(Did Radley give you banning powers? Because if he did, I’m just kidding.)
Seriously – this subject was worth posting on Agitator?
Some people list status as “in a relationship” simply because they don’t want unknown, single people trying to pick them up on FB/MS.
Using Facebook mastery as a litmus test for evaluating dating prospects kind of says something about the prospector as well.
Trust me, it’s all fake – I’ve got a book of restraining orders to prove it.
Jaybird wins the thread.
I still can’t fathom why an adult would use Facebook or MySpace.
MQC, throw yourself onto a dung heap, and you get, well, covered in dung…
No its not. My god – “dating process” – do you have flow charts and use case scenarios on the wall of your bedroom? Thankfully I’m gay so I never have to risk dating you.
(met my current boyfriend through an online social site – neither of us have updated our profiles to reflect “we are in a relationship” and we won’t)
What an interesting post that inspires me to be a first-time commenter here. It definitely doesn’t seem to be a post that’s ‘on topic’ for this blog, but still quite interesting.
Isn’t it a fascinating commentary of today’s society that our author here doesn’t want to date a person because they haven’t ‘mastered’ Facebook. Holy cow. I really hope this isn’t a trend for the future.
It really shows a judgemental nature, and I would agree with the commenter that suggested the guy might have changed his Facebook relationship status to dissuade our judgemental author. He might have picked up during the date that he just didn’t want to go there! I really wouldn’t blame him either.
A ‘dating process’ is simple. How do you feel about the person that you’re dating? That’s it. It should NOT be ‘how much of a Facebook master are they?’
What is this, Craigslist?
“The Dating Process” – A process that, when ignored, prevents you from entering relationships with people you do not want a long term relationship with anyway.
Seriously? It’s just another way to keep in touch/contact with friends from around the globe.
I was born/raised in Puerto Rico and then joined the military (where I was stationed at 5 different military bases). I have friends all over the world and it makes it much easier to see what’s going on with Joe or Mary thru FB or MS than to constantly call or email each person individually a few times a month. BTW, Skype is great because I get to talk to them for free when we’re both free at the same time.
BTW, I’m in my mid-30s and have no problem keeping up with FB or MS. My pages are nothing special, just simple text, but it’s good enough.
I would take social networking sites more seriously if they at least made an attempt to accommodate the half of the dating population they blatantly ignore in the interest of being politically and socially correct. Yes, I’m referring to married people. This is the twenty-fuckin-first century, for Christ’s sake.
For example, under Marital Status, they should have a selection that says, “Married, but I fool around”. That would, of course, only be visible to other people who have the made the same selection.
Davepen, I use it for one reason, and one reason only – reconnecting with the people I grew up with in KSA. We’re scattered all over the globe now, and it’s nice to have a place where we can “see” each other again.
Otherwise, it’s a horribly obnoxious website, although better than MySpace, which is just an assault on the eyes sufficient to induce migraines or seizures.
I don’t understand all the hate for the guest blogger. A lot of you sound like misogynistic nerds.
Dave Krueger, I suggest two options rather than one;
1. I’m married but in an open relationship.
2. I’m married but I’m an asshole.
:P
Nah. I think it’s unnecessary for people to confess to being assholes when the world is already full of people eager to make that assessment for them.
:)
Wait a sec. I don’t see anyone being misogynistic. I think most posters here tend to treat women and men about the same. Or are you suggesting that the guest blogger might be more fragile than a man and we should, therefore, refrain from our regular bluntness in deference to her vulnerability?
Dave Krueger, I guess.
But I also think that people who think they’re assholes themselves, are pretty likely to find that most people agree with them. :P
Setting: AA meeting.
Speaker: “Hello, I’m Ernst. I’ve been an asshole for 31 years.”
Group: “FUCK YOU ERNST!”
my ex removed me from facebook. it was so fucking lame. it was because i told him he was being a douche. then one guy added me, saying he was single… and then i saw the “kissing photos” and the “relationship status”.uuughh. why do they lie????