TheAgitator.com
Birdie Buggery
Saturday, February 7th, 2004This is just sick and wrong. Heaven’s sake, is no corner of earth safe from gay propaganda?
Given our trash culture, and the way the homosexuals have been pushing their agenda down our throats, I suppose it was inevitable that the “alternative lifestyle” mindset would soon enough take root in the animal world.
Now that it has, I can’t emphasize how very important it is that Roy and Silo be ostracized, shunned, and perhaps even banished from the penguin community, lest their sick love taint, corrupt, and forever alter the Antarctic wildlife family structure.
Oh sure, it’s just these two male penguin “partners” today. But if the rest of the penguins, nay the entire sub-zero ice shelf biosphere, grows tolerant of this kind of lascivious, amoral sexual liscentiousness, we’re on a very short, very slippery slope (pun fully intended) to the day when the last pristine, natural, unsoiled spot on earth degenerates into some radical, free-love, Provincetown-on-ice.
Are you ready for Otters Gone Wild? Unnatural, walrus-on-polar-bear sex orgies? Manatee bath houses?
You’d better be.
Here’s hoping the penguin community does the right thing, and shuns the sodomites right out of the colony. Sadly, that probably won’t hapen. And in just a few years, we’ll no sooner allow our children to watch the Discovery Channel than we’d allow them to watch “Queer as Folk.”
Oh man, I wonder what Opus would say about this.
Awrr, what’s that penguin doing on the telly?
http://www.ironworks.com/comedy/python/penguins.htm
Valentine’s Day at the Zoo
With Valentine’s Day upon us, Roy and Silo, two Central Park penquins, show us the love[SF. Chron. version]. The New York Times version [reg. req.] of the same article includes a picture of two homosexual penguins. A picture!!! So don’t
Sick? Well homosexuality does appear to be a dysfunction for penguins, doesn’t it? I mean come on, these guys were trying to hatch a rock…
When they start using animals as a comparison, they’ve lost. How long until some redneck beats up a gay person and says that it was natural, because the guy was invading his territory, which he clearly marked by pissing on trees.
I think it’s lovely. Wouldn’t it be fun to have two little gay dogs in love? I’m betting gay pets will be a big novelty within the next few years.
While the article cites some examples of homosexuality among animals, it is probably a very long stretch to compare sexual habits of penguins, sea gulls, and other birds with humans and there is some doubt about the sexual nature of animal bonding that does not involve actual sex. Another example used, dolphins, seems to indicate male bonding not homosexuality. With the absence of sexual activity it seems that animals may form bonds with the same sex but seldom if ever actually engage in a sex act. In other words, these examples of ‘gay animals’ are not gay because they do not have homosexual sex each other.
What’s great is that this is also the first species other than homo sapiens that mastered prostitution.
randall writes: “these examples of ‘gay animals’ are not gay because they do not have homosexual sex each other.”
Uh, randall, when the Times story says, about rhesus monkeys, “both sexes mount members of their own sex”, “mount” means “have sex”.
Also, you’re apparently too focused on gay male sex. Lesbian sex wouldn’t inherently involve penetration. It could just be mounting and rubbing. Are you saying that lesbians aren’t gay?
Also, with most birds, there is no penis involved in sex. The two birds just touch their cloacas together, and the sperm is transferred. There’s just the one cloaca on a bird, not different orifices like mammals have. All bird sex is anal sex, so it’s no different for same-sex pairs.
This reminds me of a study done on rats in a closed invironment where under normal population pressures the rats enjoyed a normal social environment. Under overpopulation the result was abuse, murder, and homosexuality. Regardless of claims otherwise it is not natural.
You know I was floating around the idea of Penguin Butlers. They would be assistants to the monkeys. Now I’m not so sure.
MaaddMaaxx writes: “Under overpopulation the result was abuse, murder, and homosexuality. Regardless of claims otherwise it is not natural.”
What’s unnatural about overpopulation?
It can happen naturally.
You’re grabbing at straws.
Frank, that is blatantly discriminatory. The ability of penguins to assist your monkey butlers in the training of other monkey butlers has nothing to do with the sexual orientation of the penguin. Simple science, man.
Didn’t the greeks like a bit of muff and fumble?
Didn’t the greeks like a bit of muff and fumble?
Indeed. Pederasty was the mark of a cultured and wealthy classical Greek man.
- Josh
I think it’s lovely. Wouldn’t it be fun to have two little gay dogs in love? I’m betting gay pets will be a big novelty within the next few years